


Human Disasters At Law

by thisbequestofwingswasbutabook



Category: Daredevil (TV), Hawkeye (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Law School
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-04
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-06 15:10:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8757550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisbequestofwingswasbutabook/pseuds/thisbequestofwingswasbutabook
Summary: Kate didn't really want to go to law school. Clint isn't really a lawyer. Matt really is a lawyer, so it's a real bummer they don't meet him, and instead just end up bumping elbows in dark alleys with Daredevil. AU where everyone is a constantly injured disaster of a human being living on caffeine and neosporin.





	1. Kate is not a lawyer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [archgirl818](https://archiveofourown.org/users/archgirl818/gifts).



> Matt isn't in the first few chapters, but I hope to add him in causing disasters with these other two messes asap.

Kate Bishop didn't want to go to law school. It was way too pretentious, and she was far too busy. But the semester before she graduated with her BA in gender studies, her parents pinned her down over a nice dinner.

"Katie your mother and I are worried about you. You're just so...well we don't think you're on the right...."

"Honey what he's trying to say is we're giving you a chance to turn your life around. Katie, you can still make your family proud. It's time you put this nonsense behind you and get with the program. You are either going to law school, or we'll send you overseas to do volunteer work until you can straighten yourself out." 

Kate snorted, taking another bite of sushi with her fingers as she stood up.

"I'm pretty busy with my volunteer work here but thanks anyway"

Her mother grabbed her wrist as she stood up, and her entire body tensed.  
"It's not an option Ms. Bishop." Her mother said firmly as she struggled to break free without making a scene. "You have a week before we will be deciding for you"

Kate pulled out of her mother's grasp and stormed out of the sushi place, grabbing a piece from her father's plate before disappearing.

Six months later she found herself kicking the wall next to the registrars office at NYU school of law. She had been hoping to spend more time after graduation focusing on her aim and her hero work but no. More classes, what a goddamn treat. 

Her first class was a disaster. The professor took her sarcastic response as proof she hadn't done the reading and ejected her from class, so she scribed the correct answer on a post it note, wadded it up, and waited until she reached the door before tossing it behind her back. She didn't have to look to know it nailed the professor on the forehead. 

"Get a sense of humor, "sir"" she muttered as the door slammed behind her. 

She stared at the bulletin board in the hall to kill time before her next class, because of course she didn't have enough time to just go home, or to the range, or any number of places she'd rather be. She rolled her eyes at the usual ads for apartments and tutors and petsitting and babysitting. All of them crisp and typed with little pull off tabs with the phone number, even though statistically most of those tabs would end up in washing machines. 

A crumpled up and re smoothed poster caught her eye. It was hand written on purple paper in some of the messiest writing she'd seen in a while, complete with coffee stain. "Law Internship" it stated in slanted capital letters at the top of the page. Lower was an address. "Looking for assistance in an actual real law office. No resume necessary. Pay for paperwork."

Kate smiled and ripped the flyer off the board, tucking it into her pocket. A law internship, that was sure to get her parents off her back. And with a flyer like that, how much work could it really be?


	2. How did we get in this mess again?

Two Weeks Earlier

Clint Barton carried a cup of coffee in each hand, balancing a hammer in the crook of his elbow as he jogged down the stairs to the Lincoln’s apartment. Standing next to the man sized hole in the wall he had left there the night before, he sheepishly knocked on the door, even though he could see a tearful Gracie Lincoln through the wreckage. The least he could do, he figured, was to maintain an illusion of privacy. And well, to fix the mess he had made before one of the kids hurt themselves on the hole in the wall.  
“Grace? It’s uh, it’s me. I um, brought coffee and figured I could fix that hole that that piece of...that’s in your wall now.”  
One of the twins under each arm, Grace came to the door, opening it just a crack.  
“Look, Clint, look. I… appreciate what you did last night. But at this point? You’ve done enough. I’ve already received a courier from his lawyer regarding an emergency hearing to remove my children from my custody in light of my “new violent boyfriend”. That’s you. Look, you’re a sweet guy. Really, I just think it would be better if you stayed away for a bit, I don’t want him seeing...well...just... and we’ll see you Friday night okay?”

His eyes hardened, unwilling to back off from protecting part of his family, and accidentally dropped one of the cups of coffee as his muscles tensed. Right then, little Jordan the three year old ran by. He caught it, an inch above his hair, and set it on the floor, picking the kid up. 

“Aha! What have I caught here?” Clint asked, tickling him mercilessly. 

“Puppy!” Jordan squealed, batting Clint's arms away “Your puppy is more fun!!”  
Clint pouted, sticking out his lip in mock tears. “You, you don’t like me Jordan?”

Jordan shook his head giggling, then frowned. “No! I like you Mr. Clint, bring the puppy pleeeease?”

Clint laughed, blowing a raspberry on the kids stomach before setting him down and ruffling his hair. 

“Sure kiddo, Friday.”

Grace grinned, shaking her head at the toddler rushing back to his toys in the living room, then frowned again as she adjusted the babies to look at the paper in her hand.

“Clint, I appreciate that you want to help, but this time I just don’t think…”

“Okay hey, look. I can fix this, I’m, I’m great at fixing things, that’s why I brought this” He held the hammer up with a dorky grin. “Tell them I’m not your boyfriend, I’m your um...lawyer.”

She raised an eyebrow. “You’re… a lawyer..” she said with disbelief. “Among everything else, you just happen to be a lawyer, and this never comes up until now? What a man.” Grace smirks, teasing him.

“Uh, man of many talents. I have to go talk to some uh, associates.” He held the cup of coffee out to her, realizing too late her hands were too full of baby to take the coffee and quickly downs it himself with a grimace. “I’ll see you and the kids Friday, Grace, I’ll fix this, don’t worry.” 

One Week Earlier

Matt Murdock paused as he went to unlock the door to Professor Jones’ office to grab the flash drive with the papers he needed to grade that afternoon. He heard a heartbeat that definitely did not belong to the grumpy old professor who happened to be his adviser for legal research, and gathered as much information on the intruder as he could. Whoever it was had a definite addition to some kind of stimulant, and was leaning against the far wall, flipping through a book of some sort. As far as Matt could figure from his months TAing and doing research with Jones, he didn’t keep any confidential documents in his office. A stimulant addiction itself again, was not a reason to break into the on campus office of a grumpy law professor. Bracing himself, he opened the door.

Clint saw the movement of the door out of the corner of his eye and grinned, sticking up his hand in a half wave. 

“You must be the Professor, Jones right? I just had a couple of, well, questions y’know.”

“You don’t belong in here.” Matt responded evenly, noting that the intruder didn’t actually know whose office he had broken into. Interesting.

“Well no. But I’ve got a friend who’s in a spot of trouble and I was hoping that--”

“Get out. You look like trouble.” Matt said with a smirk, changing his grip on his cane. He had about a hundred and fifty papers to grade before dark, and he had no time or desire to field questions from someone who crawled through a window on the ninth floor. 

“Okay, okay” Clint put his hands up, tucking the book under his arm and noting the aggressive posture the other man was taking. “It’s just that, I’m not a lawyer, but you are, and so I had a few--”

“No.” Matt said, irritated “Put the book down, and get out of this office.”

“Fine.” Clint said, dropping his hands and grabbing the edge of the open window. “I am going to have to take this book though, but don’t worry, I’ll bring it back” And with that, he swung out the window, instantly dropping out of sight.

Matt groaned, staring out the window as he closed it, and made a note to look into why on earth someone would break into the professor’s office

Clint hit the ground and turned a corner, heading home to do some reading.

“Ah shit.” he muttered. “Welp. I guess it’s just you and me book. We’ll figure this out.”

One Day Earlier

Clint carefully set the book outside the office, scribbling on ripped up paper. “I said I’d bring it back”, before ducking down a hallway and tacking the flyer he’d made that morning onto a bulletin board in the hall.

“If I can’t get help from a law professor, I’ll get a student to make this sound all legal-y”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is two weeks, one week, and one day before the events of Chapter 1. Yep that's the same professor Kate hit in the head with a post it note in Chapter 1 he's a grouch. Also changed it a bit and Matt is a Post Law student, doing research and TAing for grumpy professor. Clint heard shouting and ended up throwing Grace's ex boyfriend through a wall while he tried to attack Grace. Grace Lincoln lives in Clint's building with her twin daughters who are just under a year old, Ellie and Kelly and her three year old son Jordan. Jordan thinks he can ride Lucky. Lucky disagrees. Jordan tries anyways.


End file.
